44) Of Urine and Tailgates

August 19, 2006
Saturday

Morning: Call to Herman; they are completely full today, so I have to come in at my regular time. I tell him I’ve got a party to go to and if there is any way to get me in early, it would be great. He says, “Everyone will be here. God forgive, if anyone has to go to the hospital is the only way you might get in early.” Well, we don’t want that. So I call back at 11:30 or so from the Bat Mitzvah services at the “J”, and Ron says I can come in at 2:30, half an hour early.

El Milagro: Debbie canoodled me today and we discussed if she had ever done it to me before. Debbie and Rosie are the techs who were so excited that I was going to come to the early shift, cause I was an easy patient. I think I’ve posted before that Debbie and Rosie are the ‘Fun Girls’; always laughing, joking, and generally making all the patients smile. Today, Debbie says she has been working since 3:30 am this morning, and then she said, “I don’t know if I can do a good job sticking you”, to which I reply, “Believe me; I’ll let you know if you aren’t doing a good job.” So, we are just yaking away about something and somehow get to a point where she says, “Good thing it’s not the old days. You know how doctors used to assess for diabetes? The patient would urinate in a cup and the doctor would smell or sometimes even taste the pee. If it smelled or tasted sweet, they would know the person had diabetes.” So I say, “Yuck! Where did you learn that?”. “In physiology class. Really.” By now I’m cannulated and I’m stuck visualizing Moritz sipping urine from a shot glass and saying, “Yup. You got a tiger by the tail, boy!” . (That’s the same thing he said to me when he first talked to me and Liz about my PKD.)

I read the new Time and watch Mythbusters* experiment with the old cartoon image of the gun exploding like a peeled banana when someone sticks their finger in the barrel. It’s a myth. Herman stops by to give me my second Hep B vacine in a series of three.

Even more important to most of us Texans, these guys showed that we can get better gas mileage in our pick-ups with the tailgate UP. That’s right guys: those of you who drive around with your tailgate down, thinking it gets you better mileage are WRONG and stupid! Adam and Jamie filled up two Ford F-100s and drove them at the same speed and the one with the tail gate UP went 30 miles further. They later showed with a model truck in a water tank that with the tailgate up, air cycles tightly in the bed and causes the major air stream to flow right over it. The airflow in a truck with the tailgate down catches and pushes down on the tailgate. To see this episode #43, entitled “Seasickness – Kill or Cure” watch Discovery Channel on September 20th.

MythBusters is described in Wikopedia as "Jackass meets Mr. Wizard."** As I’m watching, I wonder what kinds of myths there could be related to kidney disease or kidney transplants that Adam and Jamie might want to explore. Do polycsystic kidneys really get as big as basketballs? Does a woman with a transplanted kidney from a man drink more beer? Do people who get kidney transplants form 3rd world countries get sympathy pains? These are myths I just dreamed up, but maybe there are some real myths out there. What would they be?

So, I get done with my dialysis at about 6:30 and shoot out to The Salt Lick*** in Driftwood for Alena’s Bat Mitzvah party. Welcome to the adult world, Alena! And, that’s the way it is today.

Notes: In at 73.9 Kg. and out at 71.2 Kg.
* MythBusters Fan Site (2006) Retrieved online August 20th from http://dsc.discovery.com/fansites/mythbusters/mythbusters.html
** MythBusters (2006) Wikopedia: The free encyclopedia. Retrieved online August 20th from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters
*** The Salt Lick (2006) Retrieved online August 20th from http://www.saltlickbbq.com/