234) The 38th Anniversary of the Breakup of the Beatles

April 10, 1970
Tuesday

El Milagro: I arrive and find my chair on the back wall and Jo the Nurse, in a brightly colored smock, smiles her way over and gets my BP and sets up my machine. She asks who I want to poke me, with the big guy, Joseph the Hulk, standing right behind her. I say, "The big guy can do it." and he smiles. Then, somehow Carrie the Tech zips in and starts unrolling the tool kit and Joseph just stands there and Carrie says, "Oh... did I interrupt something here?" and Joseph replies, "fine with me for you to do the work here." and they chuckle and Carrie ends up poking me a little too fast, causing more pain than usual.

I listen to NPR ATC (food prices up 50%!), then watch the ABC News and then channel surf over to a show about the history of horse and buggy driving (http://www.rfdtv.com/shows/ruralheritage.asp) which is moderately interesting. At 7, of course, it's Survivor... where Eliza presents a fake "hidden immunity idol" and ends up going home. My take... this series not as interesting as usual, although I do like several of the players (James and Parvati), both past series 'favorites'.

After Survivor I find that LOST isn't on. It's LOST and I can't find it! I have to watch a repeat of Restless Houswives in Suburbia. Boring.

I settle on reviewing an article about the "art" of social work practice* that posits that EBP's are okay but miss the point of excellence in the practice of social work, since canning practice strategies, doesn't allow for creativity and intuitiveness of delivery. Graybeal says, "Competence in social work... will be found... by the creation of uncommon common sense. Social work is a matter of intuitive understanding, but it must be the intuition which is unusually sound, unusually fluent and accessible, and subject to unusually careful evaluation."

Soon it is time to unhook and go out into the leaving light. So it goes.

Notes: In at 77.8 and out at 74.9
* Graybeal, C.T. (2007) Evidence for the art of social work. Families in Society: The Journal of Contemporary Social Services 88(4), 513-523.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

233) My Atrophied Little Finger

April 8, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: Get here 20 minutes late… surprising since I have been rushing all day; starting in Plano this morning at a consulting gig. I left Plano at 11 and actually made it to Enterprise to return a car and then zipped over to see Dr. Race for a 3 o’clock appt. Dr. Race is referring me to a hand surgeon, Dr. Lona, since my atrophied little finger has gotten beyond where he feels comfortable tackling the operation. What I like about Race is he is personable, friendly, and down-to-earth… so I hassle him a little about referring me to “the best” guy, which I quip, “all the docs always say”.

John the Reader calls me over to discuss last night’s championship game… we both think it was one of the best games in years and we are both happy about Kansas winning. I share about my ‘brackets’ (I picked Kansas to win it all) and John shares about his family connection to Kansas and friend connection to Memphis.

Pretty soon Rosie the Tech calls me over to my chair to set me up and sit me down. As she is checking my BP and getting ready to stick me she tells me the story of her weekend trip to Houston with her cirrhosis brother and describes her frustration in dealing with his selfishness; “none of your crosses are mine to bear”. I’m a bit confused so I agree and listen to her and reflect how frustrating it must be. She goes on for about 10 minutes while sticking me and we conclude that what goes round comes round and the way he treats people will ultimately come back and bite him in the butt.

I settle in to writing up some notes about my TA trip to CITY House and then writing this material and then listening to NPR, etc. as always.

Watch the news, kick off my shoes, and take a snooze: I am tired from two days of travel, eating rich foods, and drinking too much liquids on my trip. When I do trainings or consulting I get thirsty so I drink more on those days than the recommended 32 ounces, making me a bit puffy in the hands.

I end up watching Cracking the Maya Code on PBS and am fascinated at the amount of sleuthing it takes to translate these beautiful hieroglyphs. And, so it goes here and Now.

Notes: In at 77.9 and out at 75.0 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

232) El Nacho Malo

April 5, 2008
Saturday

Morning: I just have to record my recent foray into the world of bean nachos. Last night, after the Kick Kats beat the Lava Jets 7 to nothing, several of the mom’s decided that it was a Friday night get a drink night so we all headed to Seranno’s after the game. Of course, we arrived right at one of their busiest times and tried to find spaces for the 12 team members and about 14 parents. While we got on the list for a table for 20, most of us gathered on a long high table that traverses the bar and ordered our margaritas and chips. Finally, they set up a large table in the back room and then the mom’s found a booth to gather in, and one other dad and I chaperoned the 15 kids, including the whole team and several older and younger sibs.

For one thing, Serrano’s wouldn’t have been my choice for places to go since there isn’t much on the menu that I can eat. But, what can I say to a bunch of moms bent planning where to go for a whole team. So, I look at the menu for awhile and decide to get nachos. Why? Well, all the enchiladas are completely inappropriate. Even their green enchiladas with chicken are smothered with cheese, which doesn’t work, or even sound good to me tonight. "Tacos?" None sound good either. "Taco Salad?" Nope. So, I finally decide that bean and cheese nachos are an 'appetizer' and therefore ‘smaller’ than a full dinner. And, I can swipe off some of the cheese and beans, and the corn tortillas, although not great for me, are something I eat regularly and therefore "okay" in my dysfunctional brain.

So, since Liz is in the other room with the girls, I go ahead and order a plate of bean nachos, telling myself that I’ll take my binders right afterwards and all will be "okay". What I realize now (the next morning) is that I should also have been thinking about the nachos + binders + time + pooping equation at the time of ordering. This is a tip for all of you out there who are on dialysis and need to pay attention to what you eat.

Diet TIP: When you are thinking of ordering food (Kp), picture it binding (Vc) with your binders and moving (Kp) through your intestines and bowels and then feel it (K-) coming out the other end. Then make your choice of what to order.
[CUE --> Kp --> Vc --> Kp --> K- = Choose?]

This is, of course, is derived from the famous NLP Naturally Slender Eating Strategy, and will differ based on your own decision-making strategies. In general, the naturally slender eating strategy is cued by thinking about eating… for example, looking at a menu in the restaurant.
1. You check how your stomach feels right now (Kp)
2. You ask yourself, “What would feel good in my stomach?” (Ad)
3. See an option (create or remember) (V c/r)
4. “How would this feel in your stomach over time?” (G/Kp --> K+/K-)
5. Eat whatever will feel best in your stomach over time (1+ hr, 2+ hr, etc.), as long as it feels better than your stomach feels now.
6. CUE --> Kp --> Ad --> Vc/r --> [K+ or K-] = Choose? *

But no, I don’t really follow my tip at the time, which is why I am posting this tip today. I eat those bean and cheese nachos… along with about 20 delicious jalapeños and am just as happy as a clam afterwards.

Flash forward to 2 am, when the binders and bowels have worked and I am awakened with a bodily signal to go sit on the toilet. A word about binders: we eat stuff and then we take our binders (I take 1/2 a Fosrenol chewable, 3 PhosLo’s, and 2 Sensipars after the evening meal) which “bind” with the phosphorous and potassium in the food we just ate, and move that binded material on through the intestine and bowels so it doesn’t get ingested into the system where the kidney can no longer process it. Once binded and moved through, of course the material comes out in a bowel movement, which I refer to as poop. The consistency and frequency of passing the poop has to do with the amount of binded material and, I think, also the flagrancy of our breaking our dietary rules. In other words, the worse we eat, the worse our experience of pooping. So, here I sit at 2 am and at 5 am emptying my bowels of material binded from the tasty bean and cheese nachos with the 20 delicious jalapeños.

El Milagro: I had called in late to get a time; after we all (including Chelsea the Dog and Calla the Flower) went to the farmer’s market to buy organic doggie treats, blackberry peach jam (Yum Yum) and a columbine plant for the back hillside. Jason the Tech said I can come in at 3:15 pm.

I arrive at 3:15 and they have me in the back corner today. I say “Hi” to Margaret the Nurse who is playing with my machine as I walk up and she gives her normal “Hmmpf” and the old stone face that always makes me wonder what is up with her.

Amanda the Tech is here and we discuss school and summer plans while she sticks me. She is taking the summer off from school and gonna work full time, which will brighten this place up immeasurably. Today I can tell she has increased her confidence at sticking people, like me, for instance… an 8.5 on the old 10 point scale. She says “thanks for the feedback” in her blondie blushing way and I share with her some of our own summer plans. I think of my own daughter, Katie, and wonder what she would be like as a Tech… weird thought…

I am listening to the end of Folkways on KUT and they are in their fundraiser pledge drive and Tom Pittman (Austin Lounge Lizards) announces a pledge from Plano, Tx! They listen on the net and are sending in a pledge… cool! Us dyed in the wool partners of KUT even listen during pledge drive to see who is pledging (heard Bobbie and Theresa this morning)… we are hopeless radio heads.

Suddenly I notice a shrill siren sounding alarm and see Jason the Tech sprint across the room and into the back. We have Water Problems! Then J the T returns and talks on the phone to someone (the water guy?) and then comes around and adjusts everyone’s machine, telling me my alarm will go off again. Now he is back on the phone while inspecting some sort of manual.

Now machine is beeping to tell us “there is no water you guys” and the staff comes by about three times before I ask them to show me how to turn off the beeper myself. Aha… I finally get my machine training… en vivo. Gladys the Major Tech comes by soon and reports that the water is off and they don’t know why but the Water Guy is on his way. Even though all these machines keep beeping their water notices, I have my A+ earphones on, now listening to ATC, so I am not bugged by the whole scene.

So, the water guy gets here and talks to Jo the Nurse, telling her it is broken and she must “return” everyone. That means, return the blood that is in the machine. Before they get to us in the back corner, the H2O guy pops back out saying he replaced a filter and it is gonna work again… so everyone gets turned back on.

I’m watching the Santa Anita Derby by now. El Gato Malo; Colonel John; Meeting with Destiny… they’re all there in their finery. The short term race has Colonel John come around the far corner, move to the outside, and just zoom by five others to take the win by almost a half a body. No matter how ADD one is, you can’t get bored with a two minute horse race.

Jo comes up and reports we’re doing fine again, but by now I’ve noticed my normal wash (rinse) isn’t there and mention it to her… she apologizes, saying they are out of my rinse, so I have no rinse today. Well, you know what that means…

So, we’re on to the Final Four and again entering basketball heaven… I want Memphis to beat the Hell out of UCLA, since Memphis beat us they should show themselves to be more than anyone else can handle. If they beat UCLA then somehow I will feel better about them beating UT, since we beat UCLA earlier in the season.

Is it a case of the placebo effect or are my calves really both simultaneously cramping? The calves think it is real cramps. My brain is trying to convince my body that it is like an oppositive placebo thingie… I don’t have the rinse so I fool myself into getting cramps… and in a few minutes my leg pain convinces my brain that it just doesn’t matter (it just doesn’t matter!)… let’s yell at Amanda. She comes over and gives me some liquid, then helps me stand up and put some weight on my calves… which, after about 4 painful minutes, begins to work and I sit back down. When cramps are over I find myself feeling so happy usually… and a bit worn from the pain. Within a very few minutes of getting back to a comfy TV watching stance, my time is up. Memphis has won and I rush home to watch Kansas and North Carolina. I want our Big 12 champ to beat NC, btw.

Notes: In at 76.3 and out at 74.9 Kgs.
* NLP Practitioner Notes (1986) © Unpublished Manuscript from NLP of Colorado. Day 14, p.4
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

231) First Week of April

April 3, 2008
Thursday

El Milagro: I arrive almost on time, after stopping by a convenience store to pick up some hard candy to snack on while blood cleansing. Carrie the Tech sticks me. Herman the Nurse is here and stops to kid me about missing the training session last Sunday. Our PAC had set up a session to learn the dialysis machines for 10 am last Sunday, and out of the 10 people who signed up, only one showed up and he already knows about how the machines operate. I apologized to Herman that I completely forgot about it and although it was in my calendar, I usually don’t look at my calendar on Sunday mornings. I asked him to consider another time, and he just laughed, so I will wait a few months to schedule it again.

Jennifer the Dietician came by and we discussed the idea of dieticians bringing healthy snacks once a month and she clarified that they are willing to do a snack in the first few weeks of the month and the PAC can do something the second two weeks of the month. She is concerned that we not bring donuts and I replied that we can plan to bring recipes we have made from the DaVita website.

Tonite Survivor is back on and I am glad about that, having missed it for the past few weeks, and then, while watching it I am kinda bored by the show’s happenings and again wondering if the whole Survivor thing is over for me. Afterwards I switch over to LOST only to find another repeat. But, after that there is a new Without A Trace, which I hurry home hoping to not miss to much of the beginning.

Notes: In at 77.3 and out at 74.2 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.
<◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊>

April 1, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: I arrive 20 minutes late and my chair is ready. Alma the Tech, who is the diminutive opposite of Joseph the Hulk, comes to stick me today. She is small and seems very comfortable with her job and sticks me fast with NO pain. Rowder and the dietician come by with my labs from Easter and my phosphorous is up again and Jennifer the Dietician wants to blame it on Easter and then catches herself, saying “you don’t do Easter, do you…” but, I do eat… and, who knows what spiked the phosphorous. So, as usual, they ruminate and we decide to wait and see what comes up next lab. Rowder asks if there is anything I need and, as usual, I reply, “no”. I check the clock and again wince at the idea of my insurance paying for a two minute doctor’s visit.

I read my Saleebey book for awhile while my brain is plotting next steps for the social work licensing mess we have in Texas. I am thinking that a “call to arms” letter in the NASW Newspaper might be the way to advertise the problem in a broader way and get folks rallied to work on some rule changing activity.

I turn on NPR to get these plots out of my head. One thing about spending so much time in dialysis is there is plenty of time for plotting, thinking, and just generally considering lots of stuff we don’t usually have the time or luxury of considering. It’s like the modern equivalent of Thoreau’s sojurn at Walden Pond… not as naturalistic and idyllic… but, it does force one to sit and think.

By the end of ATC, I am looking through the TV channels (which Thoreau didn’t have at Walden Pond) and find the History Channel’s series on the Universe and immerse myself in the collisions of the universe and forget all about all my little concerns.

Notes: In at 79.1 and out at 74.5 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

230) In Which Joseph the Hulk Sticks Me

March 29, 2008
Saturday

El Milagro: I call in to find out what time I can come in and Ron the Nurse says, 2:30 so here I am at about 2:45, finding my chair on the back wall. Today it seems like the place is short-staffed, there are three nurses I can see and two techs. The guy who is in charge of cleaning the re-usable dialyzers, known as the ‘reuse technician’* is working the floor as a tech! He comes up and takes my BP and is setting up the machine and I think that he will do all that and then call Gladys’s the Tech over to stick me. But no, he plans to do it himself… and he looms over me and asks in a quiet yet formidable voice, “Is is okay if I stick you?” with a little grin.

Now, let me tell you a little about Joseph the Reuse Tech. Joseph is about 6’8” tall and probably weighs about 240. He is tall and thick like a tree, or a linebacker. He is Hispanic with short cropped hair and a tough look, with sometimes a sinister grin. He always wears black t-shirts and when he has his clear plastic apron and surgical gloves on he reminds me of a Frankensteinish figure of imposing magnitude. I don’t know if he actually has tattoos, but he could have them. He drives a dark metallic green late model Mercury sedan painted and tricked out like a moderate low rider with spike wheels and when he drives out of the parking lot late at nite it is an ominous site… such are my hallucinations about Joseph.

So when he says with that little grin, “Okay if I stick you?” I gulp and respond “Have you ever stuck anyone before?”. “Lots.”, and I choose not to question that at all. He is a slow poker, going from step to step in a laborious way that causes me to hallucinate that either he doesn’t know what he is doing or he is very careful to proceed with each step in a self-conscious and thoughtful way. Throughout the process, as he goes back and forth to the machine, he continually asks Jo the Nurse questions about the settings, so even if he does know sticking, he seemingly knows the machine less well. I ask Joseph, “So, is sticking people a move up?” and he just looks back without letting me know anything about if he even understood that question. He makes a non-informative grunt or maybe it is an affirmation… or, maybe a shrug… it is hard to read… and we go on.

I note that although Jo the Nurse is coaching Joseph on the machine, neither she nor any other nurse comes by today to do a nursing eval.

Joseph sticks me with the power of a 240 lb man with Blutoish arms… the needle POPS into my vein with none of the normal resistance my scared veins put up. Pop! In goes one needle. Pop! In goes the second. Done. He deftly tapes ‘em up and I say, “Good job” and he grumbles, “Thanks”. Whew. That’s over and Joseph the Hulk moves off to loom over another patient down the line.

Ah Saturday: I don’t feel like reading the book I have been bringing every session, which I am supposedly reading in prep for my Fall class on SF Therapy. The book is Dennis Saleebey’s, The Strengths Perspective in Social Work Practice and today it lays in the bottom of my bag untouched. I draft this post and then I surf the channels and end up watching one of the History Channel's shows on How the Earth was Made, about the clash of continents and the upheaval of mountains, etc.

From there I go to the clash of March Madness Basketball teams; specifically North Carolina and Louisville… the white headed wonder (Roy Williams) chesting up against our brylcreem boy, Rick Patino. A good game and yet we all know in our hearts that NC can’t really be beat this year… at least not yet. So I keep cheering for Louisville to come back, even though they spend most of the game 7 points down. And, of course, on my brackets I have NC at this level… but it is more fun to cheer on Patino’s boys.

I finish my blood cleansing session before the game is over and rush home to watch the final few minutes. And so it goes, Kokomos.

Notes: In at 77.1 and out at 74.4 Kgs.
*What is a reuse technician? Retrieved from Davita online, at //www.davita.com/UploadedImages/ReUse
Tech.gif&imgrefurl=http://www.davita.com/dialysis/c/621&h=200&w=200&sz=

16&hl=en&start =11&um=1&tbnid=YtG6is1zJugywM:&tbnh=104&tbnw=104&prev=

/images%3Fq%3Ddialyzer%26um %3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dsafari%26rls%3Den%26sa%3DX
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

229) What's your name? Is it Mary or Sue?

March 27, 2008
Thursday

El Milagro: I arrive and weigh in before my chair is ready so I hand out the El Milagro News that they have finally copied for us. I notice as I hand it out that people seem to be ready and excited to see it… I think it is catching on. Now if only folks would submit things for the next issue. I am thinking I want to send one over to the doctor’s office too and argue with myself about whether I should send a hard copy or a PDF.

Carrie the Tech sticks me today and it is a milestone: for the first time ever I don’t feel the first poke at all! I mention that to her and she says that sometimes people say that… and “thanks”. I am amazed at the experience but before I can celebrate too much the second poke comes and I do feel it’s prick of pain and I am brought back to reality… wondering how that first stick happened… is it the case that we have places where there are absolutely no nerve cells?

Carrie and I talk about my work day and I share that it was okay… a meeting with the state folks where we tried to get their blessings on a research project… and, of course, they can’t really do much… blah blah… However, we did plant the seed and they did say they would write a letter supporting the project, so I guess that is the most one can ever expect with the kinds of constraints they always must work under.

When Carrie is done, the new nurse whose name escapes me right now comes up and does my nursing evaluation. What is her name? She makes it worse by saying, “So, Jack, how are you feeling today?” while I’m staring back at her blankly, thinking, Zelda?, Marian?, Christy?… trying each of these monikers on with her face. No help. I do know a way to meet someone and immediately remember their name and I search my memory for if I did that strategy when I met her… nope. I never come up with her name and she is now gone on to serve some other customer.

The strategy? Well, as you meet someone for the first time, look at their face, say their name aloud, imagine it written in magic marker on their forehead, and simultaneously ghost write it on your thigh. This works pretty well because it uses all your rep systems to anchor the name. Of course, you have to remember to do it.

I turn on the TV and watch the ESPN Sports-center, with Bobby Knight talking about March Madness, and then flip to the first game tonight, North Carolina and Washington State… well, you can guess how that one is going… and pretty soon we are flipped over to the most exciting game of the evening; Xavier and West Virginia. Even though I have Xavier winning on this level (on my brackets), I am cheering for WVU and their young-looking boy, Alexander. Great game which goes into overtime.

As it finishes I finish with the blood cleaning operation and am going home happy cause I love watching college basketball. Life is Good.

Notes: In at 78.2 and out at 74.9 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

228) The Pascal Moon & March Madness

March 22, 2008
Saturday

El Milagro: I call in the morning and Jason the Tech checks and says, “When do you want to come in?” and we agree on 12:30. The parking lot is empty when I arrive.

So, here I am @ 12:30 and Rosie happily sticks me (and is seemingly from her smiles and laughter in a very good considering she had planned to be out of town visiting her sister today instead of working) and reports that it’s the holiday weekend that makes everyone want to get out of here early. Rosie and I are yakking away and she puts my tempo-dot ultra-modern paper temperature taker thingy in backwards and I sit there for awhile mum while she pokes me… and then she checks the reading and there is none. Her eyes widen! I’m DEAD! “Oh yeah” she laughs… “I put it in backwards…” and we start the process over.

Jo the Nurse comes by to do my nursing eval and asks me if we are getting ready for Passover, since Easter is this weekend… and I report to her what I’ve heard about Easter on the radio, and conclude, “Passover (“...is celebrated on a specific date which is the fourteenth day of the Jewish month of Nisan. Since Christians used the Roman custom of measuring days from midnight to midnight, the date is the 14th, but for Jews, who measure a day from sunset to sunset, the Passover, which begins after sundown, the date is the 15th day of the month of Nisan”*) starts April 19th this year, and Easter is earlier than normal, based on the Pascal Moon”. I continue to tell her what I have heard about the date of Easter being connected to the date of the Pascal moon. “So, this year, instead of Easter and Passover being close, Easter is close to Purim***, which was celebrated last night at our congregation”. Jo’s response was surprise… “I didn’t know that! That’s blasphemous!” she cried… clarifying that the church changed the date from one based on Passover to one based on a moon. Neither of us know how, when and why that happened and we agreed it would be a good reason to hit the internet. Well… here ya go, answer-o… “At the Council of Nicaea, called by the Emperor Constantine in 325, it was formally decreed that all (Christian) Churches would celebrate Easter on the same Sunday and that the Sunday would be the Sunday that followed the fourteenth day of the Pascal Moon.”*

James the Nurse comes by and stands thoughtfully, watching the basketball previews on my TV… finally turning to comment on the games so far. We discuss the Big 12’s standings with KSU, KU, UT, Okla, and A&M still in the throw. Only BU is gone so far. Today we have the W. Virginia / Duke game and I share with James that I almost picked WVU but in the end went with Dukies. Mike Krzyzewski’s going for his 70th tourney win today, the highest number of wins of any playing coach!

So I settle back to watch some March Madness and notice that my neighbor chair’s guy toss his Sprite can in the trash. This could be another job for PAC People! I note that I should bring up the idea of a recycling program at El Milagro at our next meeting.

Later: well the Dukies lost it. What a great game! Well worth watching even though WVU’s win makes my 5th loss in my brackets. As the KSU / Wisconsin game gets under way I get unhooked and ready to go home and watch some basketball. So it throws.

Notes: In at 76.2 and out at 74.0 Kgs.
*Chuck (nd) Why the date of Easter changes each year. Retrieved online March 2008 from HubPages, http://hubpages.com/hub/Why_the_Date_of_Easter_Changes_Each_Year
**Passover: Festival of freedom (nd) Retrieved online March 2008 from the Chabad.org website, http://www.chabad.org/holidays/passover/pesach_cdo/aid/1723/jewish/The-Passover-2008-Calendar.htm
***Rich, T.R. (2007) Purim Retrieved online March 2008 from the Judaism 101 website, http://www.jewfaq.org/holiday9.htm
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

227) Spring Has Sprung & I Am Late

March 20, 2008
Thursday

El Milagro: How late can I come to dialysis? Well, today I am an hour late! Rosie asks, “Why are you so late?” and I reply, “I have no idea. I checked the time sometime earlier at work and then things started happening and all of a sudden I looked at the clock and it was 4:40! So, I called here and got Suzanne on the phone and told her I was on my way and to apologize to you all.” Then, of course, the traffic was bumper to bumper pre-bunny all the way across town.

“Oh. You lost track of time” she replied. Her reply bushwhacked my little brain a little… I lost track of time?… that would’ve been an easy thing to say… why didn’t I think of it? Then she added, “so, I guess we won’t let you off til 8:30…” to which I responded, “how about only 3 hours since I only gained 2 pounds or so?” She snickered and only much later did I get it: she was suggesting 3 hours.

Today is the first day of Spring and Zilker Park was full of people, reminding me of Les Grande Jatte by Suerat… in the way of perfection being reminiscent of a clear day with sparkling color and bright hues splashing around, which also slowed me down. In Sureat’s painting I always hallucinate that these folks have left work early to go to the park, although I believe he mostly painted Sunday strollers. Anytime the weather and colors are striking, I immediately jump in my mind to this painting; perfect reflection of light and color.

As Rosie is poking me and setting me up, Ron the Nurse comes by to do my nursing evaluation and I ask them for feedback about the recent St. Patricks’ Day snacks. Rosie replies that staff loved my cookies ("they’re not too sweet; just right") and Ron added that the staff have really had a good week, food wise. There were cupcakes, my cookies, and a cake brought by someone today. I mentioned that perhaps the idea is catching on for bringing snacks. I added that I would love to bring a big hotel tray of enchiladas except we on dialysis can’t eat them… and that somehow tangented into my describing our chile rellenos to Rosie. She likes 'em with cheese and carne... we from El Paso, only with the anaheim chile and the white cheese.

They move on and I settle in to watching ABC News: we have thousands of troops coming home with traumatic brain injuries and Bob Woodward interviews them over and over and it is a sad report on the war and the government’s putting effort into the war but not so much on caring for the kids afterwards.

I am awaiting Survivor but to no avail… Duh. March Maddness has taken over CBS: which is okay… so I watch A&M beat BYU. Later I click back and forth from basketball to LOST and somehow I get lost in the shuffle. I get unhooked and shoot home to see the end of lost… too late and now we are all lost.

So it goes.

Notes: In at 77.7 and out at 74.7 Kgs.
BTW: I know I haven't posted in awhile... have been busy with my ongoing life and in and out of town and even thinking about other ways to take this blog... and haven't really come up with anything... so I haven't been super motivated to write. (In case you wonder)
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

226) A Visit from Liz

March 11, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: Today is a little strange cause Herman the Nurse is here filling in for someone AND Suzanne the Administrator is on the floor! The place has had some trouble with keeping up with the state requirements for staff on the floor, and is trying to hire techs and get them trained… for some reason today Suzanne and Herman are here helping out. It’s nice to see that the administration works the floor and I can tell that Suzanne will learn something that will help her as an administrator. I have always agreed with the concept of cross training and I can observe Suzanne’s mind working as the techs are showing her their tasks and regimens.

Today I get John the Reader’s chair as he is leaving. He says he is somewhat better and he looks better. Carol the Tech sticks me and I settle in to my session, listening to NPR in my ears and deciding to have brief doze first. Someone is gently jiggling my leg… it is Lizzie! She has dropped by to bring me some candy. She stays for awhile and I am temporarily one of those people who has someone there with them. Very Cool! I introduce her to Suzanne and Herman brings her a chair and we sit there and talk a bit and look at the TV. I get an idea of how devoted these people who come and sit by their loved ones are that I hadn’t had before. Anyway, it is a neat thing and then she leaves and I start watching something on TV…

Notes: In at 76.9 and out at 74.8 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

225) Dancing Feet

March 8, 2008
Saturday

El Milagro: I called and am able to come in “…in 20 minutes…” so I rush around and am here at 1 o’clock today. Rosie is in a dog shirt, working the other side of the room… Debbie the Tech is here today, as is Gladys the Tech. Rita the Nurse cannulates me and does my nursing eval. She is evidently one of the nurses who doesn’t mind “lowering herself” to do the poking.

The other day in our PAC (Patient Advisory Committee) meeting one of the complaints of the patients to the administration was that some of the nurses won’t cannulate people because they feel it is below them. This was brought up while discussing the patient complaint that the center is way behind on getting people on the machines on time, and some of the PAC members think that the scheduling could be better accomplished if certain techs weren’t sitting around B.S.ing with each other rather than working diligently to get all the patients on the machines. This is complicated, according to these folks, by nurses who see it as below their station to hook patients up on the machines. My comment: Do you really want a nurse who doesn’t want to hook people up, hooking you up?

So, anyway, Rita is a 'hookin-up nurse'… and she hooks me up deftly and quickly. I’m listening to KUT’s Folkways and they’ve playing a lot of pre-SXSW* people today. Maggie Walters (Midwestern Hurricaine), James McMurtry (Just Us Kids), Bo Bice, Joe Ely, Justice Townes Earl, etc.

I’m eating apple slices from home today… unusual for me to have anything to eat here aside from the hard candy rolling around in the bottom of my bag. Lizzie cut some apple and bagged some cookies for me to munch on, since I hadn’t eaten lunch before I left. I munch with Justin Townes Earl crooning about “…the good life from now on…”, and I am glad to have such a juicy snack. Lizzie is the BEST! Of course, everyone who knows her knows that… it is still surprising to me that she chose me to hang with, I say to myself smilingly.

I munch and listen and read the new Time about Hillary’s return to the race… seems like women put her back in it… I read and then doze…

The Bluerunners** are playing live when I come back around 2… Cajun band… good beat makes my feet dance out from under the red, Mexican blanket covering them. I look down and watch them feets jumping around, almost as if they were independent of the rest of this body. It’s a weird sight and gives me that sense of the largeness of the body… like when you realize that this body is just an incredibly long line of cells joined together by some sort of mystical energy called life. When I look down that Levi and flannel covered collaboration of cells across the universe and see the maroon socks poking out from the end of the ragged blue jeans under the Mexican blanket… they seem to be light years away from these eyes in my head. They are dancing to the beat of the Bluerunners' rhythms in my earphones… so there must be a stimulus response thing going on that is devoid of conscious thought… I feel like Steve Martin*** when he has crazy feet… (You can't actually see Steve's feet in this pic, but I like the idea of cat ironing).

I watch these dancing feet of mine through the rest of the Bluerunners’ set and at some point notice that a diabetic amputee across the way seems to be watching my feet and I hallucinate that he is wishing he had dancing feet too. The slow impact is that somehow my brain of brains reconnects with my unconscious rhythm-meister and those feet slowly slow their jigs down to a calming stillness.

I decide to click off Folkways and turn up the TV, which has been silently showing various basketball games. I find a movie, then a music video of Bruce Robison****, and finally settle on the Discovery series, How’s It Made about making winter coats, stoves, and canisters for pre-formed potato chips I can’t eat. Oh well…

Another Saturday… Onward through the Fog…

Notes: In at 76.4 and out at 74.7 Kgs.
* South-by-Southwest - SXSW - online http://sxsw.com/
**Bluerunners online at http://www.bluerunners.com/home.html
*** Check out Steve Martin's website --> http://www.stevemartin.com/
****Bruce Robison online at http://www.brucerobison.com/
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

224) Primary Day @ Dialysis

March 4, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: It’s primary day and I wonder how many of these folks here at the center have voted. I'm curious about patients and staff... are these voting people? I voted this morning, bright and early. As I’m asking around I find that Rosie the Tech hasn’t voted yet, but still plans to. Carol the Tech asks if we can still vote after today… she intended to vote in early voting but never did actually get there. I let her know it's almost too late, and I kid Rosie that if she doesn’t vote, my candidate will do better... and she re-commits to voting before 7.

Kim the Nurse is working to cannulate me and set up my machine. She reports that she is registered to vote in Round Rock but now lives in Buda. She complains that “they” should let us vote wherever we are and there should be no precints or boundaries on our right to vote.

The Doc comes by for a “drive by” with Jennifer the Dietician and informs me that they are now doing things a bit differently; that they will concentrate on one part of the medical review each week. Today it is BP. My BP looks fine to him, so if there is nothing else, he’ll see me next week. So, this drive by was less than a minute.

While watching the news and seeing what they say about the exit polls, etc., I hear that UT is playing Nebraska tonight, so I find the game and settle back to enjoy the surprise of a basketball game I didn’t know was happening today. I watch the game and switch over to the news stations once in awhile to check on my favorite Democratic candidates throughout the game. The game and the primary are both close calls but the good guys win in the end.

Since UT and most of my candidates win tonight, it is a good night! I pack up my bag at the end and head home, satisfied with the day and happy to still be enjoying life.

Notes: In at 76.9 and out at 74.8 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

223) Of Mammoths & Mishaps

March 1, 2008
Saturday

El Milagro: Called in at 2 and Rosie the Tech said I can either come in at 2:30, “or forget it”. She has one ten minute opening and a chair, if I can get there by 2:30. I thank her, grab a sandwich, and ZOOM across town, arriving right at 2:30 on the dot… but forget my starting weight in the rush to make it to the chair on time. “So, that’s my fault?” Rosie quips. “No… I have an internal locus of control so I take full responsibility for all my mistakes and my Swiss cheese brain.” Rosie sets me up and pokes me. Kim the Nurse does my nursing eval. Today I am on the North wall, beside John the Reader. Jo the Nurse says “Hi” when she comes by to fiddle with the chair-side computer, as does Amanda the Tech.

I am waiting for the UT – Tech game to start at 3. Jo comes by to shoot my epogen into my blood circuit and I notice her sticking three syringes into the docking valve and ask “6600?” She replies, “9900” so it looks like I’m getting even more than I thought I was. Later Jo clarifies that they must’ve boosted me to 9900 on Thursday cause that’s when they adjust meds based on peoples lab reports.

I get my mind off epogen-related vein explosions and concentrate on the UT game… which goes down the tubes at the end and Tech ends up winning. DAMN! That about ruins my day, so I click over to Discovery Channel and half-heartedly watch “Raising the Mammoth”, which does take my mind off the loss to Tech... watching these guys spend a coupla years digging a big old mammoth out of the permafrost bog of Siberia. Chilly!

John the Reader is having some difficulty with his session today... chest pains that lead Kim the Nurse to bring over the oxygen machine... and then, somehow, his trocar gets pulled out and blood shoots all over the place and John yells out "OH NO!" and Rosie runs over to clamp off the geyser... and Kim runs to check the machines, and then things get back to normal. For a minute there are 4 staff hovering around John and wiping up the mess and making sure he is okay and comfortable. Watching them jump in this kind of emergency situation makes me confident that they can handle just about anything that comes up here. I sit beside John, watching my mammoth show while also checking on him outa the corner of my eye. He is resting with his eyes closed and seems to be doing alright. They stop his session and patch him up and he rests. When he is ready to get up and take a standing BP, I ask him how he is doing... and he shares that it has been a rough week. He looks tired. He continues that he had two mini heart attacks this past week, was hospitalized and they put two stints in and then one of them collapsed. So, they aren't going to repair that one and he has a doctor's appointment Monday where he'll challenge the doc about why they even did a stint where he thinks they didn't need to put one. I support him by encouraging him to be upfront and assertive with the docs.... remembering to ask what else they could have done (see post # 217; Groopman). I wish John good luck and watch him shuffle out of the big room, on his way to weigh several times and get an average weight.

Reminds me to ask Rosie the Tech if she completed the form to have the weighing machine checked, which she forgot... but then went and got a form right then and filled it out in front of me. Jo wonders why John's weight is always different and mine is always the same, and I reply... "So... thats why we're asking for the thing to be checked!" but I understand her confusion about the whole story.

By 7:30 I am ready to shoot outa here… and Rosie cheers me out by saying, “Try not to think of this place for awhile…” Onward through the bog.

Notes: In at 75.8 and out at 74.6 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

223) Epogen Aneurysms Anyone?

February 28, 2008
Thursday

El Milagro: I’m here on time again! Meet Jennifer the Dietician on my way in and she concernedly reports that my phosphorous is high again (6.2… and 3.5 to 5.5 is normal) and asks if I have been to Laredo. I say, “No… but, I was in Michigan last weekend.” I add that its probably the fault of “on the road” food, and she nods that home cooking is always better… and, then adds that my blood count is lower too, and they are going to give me 6600 units of epogen ("more than you've ever had before"), which I hallucinate is enough to boil my red blood cells and give me multiple aneurisms in my brain and lungs… so, I just roll my eyes at her, say I’ll do better on my diet, fold up the report she gives me, and slink off to my chair.

Rosie the Tech comes to cannulate me and set up my machine. I bring up Kim the Nurse’s pregnancy… a safe topic that is not about my blood boiling brain explosions. “Wow, that girl is getting BIG” I throw out. “Yeah. She looks like she gonna explode!” replies Rosie, wide-eyed. And then she adds, “they’re gonna do a caesarian section this time…” and I wonder what we can talk about now…

Celeste the Nurse comes up to do my nursing eval and is unusually friendly and I wonder if Ron the Boss Nurse is working with her ‘bedside manner’. Later I call Ron over to explain to me my epogen increase. He reports that 6600 units (they call ‘em units because the come in little vials that aren’t exactly any exact amount, about 1.1 cc’s I think he says) and my mind is picturing 6 thousand 6 hundred little vials rolling around in a box and the nurses chasing them around to fill a syringe… and then Ron complicates my visual image even more by saying that actually a dose is 3300 so I get 2 doses. I decide to try another question, so I ask about how it works. Ron is happy to share that epogen stimulates red blood cell production and it also helps the red blood cells live longer. I fantasize that that is before they blow up in my brain. Then Ron actually makes me feel better when he says, confidentially, that I really am not getting that much… some patients get 20,000 units! We should all be wearing helmets when their brains explode! I thank Ron for explaining all that to me, and turn to pay attention to NPR. I am feeling better just knowing that other people get way more of this dangerous, killer drug than I do.

Notes: In at 76.9 and out at 74.3 Kgs.
‘Epogen’ retrieved online from Drugs.Com, http://www.drugs.com/epogen.html
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

<◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊><◊>

February 29, 2008
Friday:

Home: While watching the ABC news I went online to answer a survey about whether or not I agree that adopted people should have the right to know about their birth parents... and found the ABC Discussion Board... and then found this discussion topic:

Paying for Kidneys: What do you think?
More than 5,000 Americans die each year waiting for a kidney. One prominent surgeon has a radical solution to the organ shortage: Pay for them. The president of the American Society of Transplant Surgeons proposes offering $60,000 or more to people willing to give up one kidney. Most surgeons are appalled at the idea. What do you think? Is this the marketplace at work, or an ethical nightmare?

What I Think: “As a person who is on dialysis and waiting for a kidney now for a couple years, I think it would be GREAT for the government to pay people to give up a kidney for use by someone who needs one. This practice is already going on in third world countries for much less money, and at the expense of people who have much less sophisticated medical care to take care of any crises. Those countries see the United States' as coming in and harvesting kidneys and that practice probably doesn't improve our reputation world-wide. The idea of harvesting kidneys in our own country keeps the money here, helps out people who may need money to buy back their mortgages, and supports the American brother-help American brother idea. As for the ethical-moral questions, those should be left up to individuals who have these kind of choices in front of them. Most of the organized religions have already made statements supporting the giving of organs. Many of the patients awaiting kidneys will take the organ now and wrestle with their religion, if needed, later.

Now, some people might say that paying for an organ is just not right... but, trust me... when it is your medical situation and you find yourself wasting away in dialyland, you make choices that keep you on the planet. I say harvesting and paying for kidneys is a win-win proposition for people who need a kidney and for people who could use a fairly safe 60 K.” austinjak

Notes: Posted 2/29/08 on ABC News’ Discussions, available online at http://forums.abcnews.go.com/n/pfx/forum.aspx?folderId=7&listMode=13&nav=messages&webtag=
ABCWorldNews

222) Memories of Michigan

February 26, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: I arrive here on time again, driving directly from renting a car at Enterprise for a quick trip to Victoria tomorrow to do a workshop on Ethical Conversations with Youth. Another Pontiac... this time it’s a new G-6. I might note here that one of the perks of traveling around the state doing workshops is renting new cars to cruise in.

I weigh in today at 78.9… a little high, but makes sense after going 4 days without dialysis… wow… you know, I have never in the last 22 months gone for four days without getting dialyzed! Noting that in my brain of brains throughout the day today, I note that I don’t really feel any different, so 4 days is not enough, I guess, to begin to feel bad. It is enough to pull the weight up a bit… and I am glad that I don’t actually feel the four days…

I walk into the big room and wander around looking for my chair… and realize that it isn’t ready yet… Carol the Tech points over at a chair filled with a body that is holding their punctures, waiting to get taped up… and I realize I have some time to wait… but then Kim the Nurse calls out to one of the tech trainees to set me up in an empty chair across the way… and voilá, I have a chair. So, they set me up and that takes about 15 minutes for the machine to get to know the dialyzer [time for the machine to run its components tests and then rinse the dialyzer before they hook me up. This is still a better deal than waiting for the other chair.

So, I am sitting here pondering the trip to Michigan while waiting to get hooked up. This trip introduced my new family to my old family… and I am always surprised at the immediate feelings of closeness I feel to relatives like my cousins, Susan and Elaine. I hadn’t seen them since my mom’s memorial service in Lawrence about 16 years ago. Susan, especially, and I were close as young children and that familiarity, I hallucinate, is still there and when I first saw her in the community room of the Congregational Church in Bangor, it was like no time had passed since the last time. The memorial service was an opportunity for Shayna to observe the rituals and hear the liturgy of a Christian service. Also, Shayna commented on how many relatives I have in Michigan and I laughed and explained to her that most of these people were friends of my Aunt Marilyn, not relatives… and I pointed out the actual relatives I could pick out of the group. Shayna was still impressed with the amount of people. She was also impressed with all the snow, since she has never been in snow… so, of course, we had to find a field for her and Liz to run and play in. Finally, we went out to my mom’s family’s (now my Cousin Susan’s) cottage which had been the center of my summers as a child, and was featured in the memorial service as a favorite memory of each generation of the family. It was fitting that the whole scene was covered with the whiteness of snow and cold… it somehow leant a sense of purity to the experience. I was very glad I decided to make the trip, and now sit back in the comfort of that choice and the memories it gives me.

Onward through the snow.

Notes: In at 78.9 and out at 74.9 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2006 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

221) Early Dialysis for Michigan

February 22, 2008
Friday

El Milagro: I am here on time bright and early at 6 am on the dot. Actually it is dreary and early, not bright and early and the only brightness is the glisten of neon in the puddles from pre dawn drizzle. I am really tired since I got up and zoomed over here without even a drop of coffee… my thought, “just go over there… no time for making coffee… go and go back to sleep…” I was just here last night, and took off 2.4 kgs, weighing out at 75.3, .3 over my dry weight. This morning I weigh in at 73.1, so I lost some weight since I left last night? This is one of the mysteries of life, dialysis, and sleeping. And, I am too drowsy to think much about all these numbers and mysteries.

As I am walking in I see and nod hello to Matt the Tech and Debbie the Tech, who I never see anymore cause they work MWF. A tech that I sleepily assess to be a new guy comes up to me in my chair and introduces himself as Blake. He ploddingly sets up my machine almost as if he is doing it in slow motion, like my current state of wakefulness. I blink my eyes and then blink my brain to see if this perception is me… but even after blinking he is plodding. I cannot tell if he is unsure of every move, half asleep, or just really cautious. He does tell me every step he is taking and by 6:30 he is finally ready to stick me. He sticks alright but isn’t sure of his work so he calls Bear the Tattooed Tech over to review his work.

When Blake asks me how much weight I want to take off, I relay that was just here last night and today weighed in at less than my dry weight and ended with, “…so what do you do in this situation?” He shows a blank look, shrugs and says, “Take off the minimum?” like he is answering a test question. I can’t figure out if that is ‘his final answer’ or a question to me, so I just say “sure” and we are off to the slow motion morning again. In the back of my brain my small worry voice is predicting that this is a BP crash waiting to happen.

So the batteries on my radio need changing and I change two of the three and it works and I lay back to listen to the morning NPR offerings and snooze… for about two hours until I start feeling a cold sweat, general wooziness, and faintness associated with low BP. I look over at the machine and my last BP is something over 49, the 49 in red, signifying to any observer that the machine thinks it is too low. The next time it takes my BP both the numbers are showing red… 70 something over 45. I get Jason the Tech’s attention and he gives me some saline to bring the BP back up. It seems to take a 10 gallon hat of saline to get things back to normal and finally it is time to leave and I’m feeling better. I pack up my stuff and my brain is on into scheduling the day, thinking of all the things I have to do before catching a flight to Chicago at 4 o’clock.

I weigh out at 73.1… the same as my coming in weight! Oh well… at least my blood is clean. Since I’m still under my dry weight, I’m okay (meaning; not feeling it was a waste of time) with the session.

Later: Shayna and I are all packed and on our way to the airport, where we’ll meet Lizzie and catch a flight to Chicago. We’re flying American, so, of course, the flight is 2 hours late. We wait and Shayna gets ice cream and we finally get on the plane and fly across the country. Landing in Chicago is easy and before we know it we’re shooting out through Chicago, on our way to Paw Paw, Michigan in a rented wide-track Pontiac with brilliant RED dash lights that almost are too much. It’s cold cold cold in Chi-town, so we all get to wear our winter overcoats and boots. We find a good Jazz station to listen to and get into Michigan before stopping at a Flying J Truck Stop for dinner. I get a hot roast beef sandwich that reminds me of Midwestern real American Food… thick, heavy with Dark Brown gravy that sticks to your ribs. There is snow everywhere but thankfully not on the roads… and Shayna is delighted to touch and jump into her first snow experience. We get to our motel in Paw Paw by 11 and are happily ready to sleep. Tomorrow we will attend a memorial service for my Aunt Marilyn (see Post # 209, January 2008) who finally passed on and we will introduce Lizzie to my mom’s family, see the cottage, and visit with relatives. What a day.

Notes: In at 73.1 and out at 73.1 Kgs.
New Readers: For an INDEX, click January 2008 on the Sidebar and page down to post # 207.

220) Watch for the Sneezy Tech

February 19, 2008
Tuesday

El Milagro: I arrive and weigh in at 77.7 Kgs. and say “HI” to John the New Guy (who isn’t really that new anymore so we should rename him… let’s call him John the Book Reader since he reads a lot.) So, anyway, as I am weighing in John is finishing his session and standing there ready to weigh out. We exchange pleasantries and John mentions that this scale is still not working correctly. I observe as he steps on the scale and checks his weight and exclaims, “It is 1.3 Kgs different than it was a minute ago!” So, I decide to weigh again and I’m the same weight I was a minute ago. And then he weighs again and he gets a third new weight! He remarks that only occasionally does he weigh out at the amount they set the dialysis machine to take off. So, here we are… two grown guys jumping on and off the scale to do research on its’ weighing behavior. He is always different and I am always the same.

I tell John that my ending weight is never the same as they plan on the machine… it’s always lower and that I thought that the calculation on the machine and the outgoing weight weren’t even connected. John looks at me askance (hallucination: as if I am crazy). All of a sudden I realize that we live in different worlds: he may be one of those people like my brother-in-law, Larry, who have an engineer’s mind… the kind of people who expect ‘A’ to lead to ‘B’ and things to be naturally logical. John was a guy who set up high-end sterio systems, so the engineering mind would make sense. At any rate, I could tell John was a bit surprised by my summation about no connection between numbers… so, I added, “maybe it doesn’t matter that the weights are different..” I too was surprised at HIS logic tht those two numbers should jive… interesting thought. I go on in my mind to think… maybe we just come here and they take the weight off and then we go and then come back and they take weight off again and so on and the actual numbers are just fluff.

John intimated to me that since I am his PAC representative, he’d like me to bring up the fact that the weighing machine is screwy…. so, I promise I will.

When I get to my chair I touch base with Rosie the Tech, asking her about re-calibrating the weighing platform, and she says she will fill out a form to get it done.

A new tech comes by to set up my machine and I check my dialyzer and bath and they are correct. As she is working on setting up my machine she is snorting, sniffling and sneezing… without even covering her mouth, so I immediately get a bad impression and when she asks if she can stick me I have hallucinations of germs all over her body, so I beg off, asking her to ask Rosie to do it instead. For future tech readers of this blog, when you go to stick someone for the first time, 1) be friendly and introduce yourself first; 2) avoid sneezing all over everything (if you have the sniffles, wear a mask); and, 3) ask nicely if the person is okay with you sticking them.

So, Rosie came and stuck me and now I am listening to NPR…

So it goes.

Notes: In at 77.7 and out at 74.7 Kgs.

219) Sloshy Sleety Saturday

February 16, 2008
Saturday

Afternoon: In the sleet and wind gusts strong enough to knock over lawn chairs and flip umbrellas, the Kick Kats beat the Lava Jets 3 – zip! When we arrived at the field it was so cold I turned right around and went back home to get stocking caps, gloves, and my overcoat. Shayna played well in the second half (only 85% in the first half) and had two opportunities to score on crossovers after corner kicks. After the game, walking back to the car across the field in the mud, she reported that her last kick was actually a score because the goalie caught it behind the goal line, but the ref didn’t see it. One of the lessons of the game, I reply, and I told her I thought she attacked the ball better today.

El Milagro: In at 4 and right into my chair on the back wall. My legs and shoes are still soaked from soccer but the place seems warmer than usual. On the way in I see Gladys the Tech and go by to say HI to her: “long time no see…” and she smiles a “Hi” but doesn’t explain where she’s been. Carol the Tech sticks me effortlessly and painlessly and Kim the Nurse completes my Nursing eval. My dialyzer and baths are correct, I note.

Rosie the Tech is floating around and we have a short conversation about the Democratic Primary, being on different sides and each making a brief statement supporting our choice. This comes up because Bill Clinton is down the street tonight, opening Hillary’s Austin campaign office. I share that I signed up online to go to the event right after dialysis. No matter whom I support, I always like to hear Bill talk.

I am listening to Saturday’s All Things Considered while waiting for the UT / Baylor game at 5:30. I hear an interesting interview with a guy, Mike Doughty (not our Mike Doughty) who is a singer and Army Brat Poet who is discussing his songs and growing up with an Army dad who wouldn’t discuss Viet Nam. In the interview, Andrea Seabrook mentions that he was in a poetry class taught by Sekou Sundiata*, who also was, I believe, a mentor of our friend Reggie. It is a small world out there… or, maybe it is just that many of us attend and draw from a small crescent sliver of the world… at any rate its been awhile since I heard anyone talk about Sundiata. She mentions that Doughty quotes Sundiata on the album cover…

"Everything in the dream is the dreamer"

I ponder this and doze on it for awhile while ATC melts away into Garrison Keeler at Indiana U, singing in his Prairie Home Companion and I tune that out to tune in to a brief movie enroute to the game… watching the psychotic seductions of Alex (Glenn Close) in Fatal Attraction just enough to be scary (about 20 minutes) and then turning over to ESPN for the game.

I watch the game progress and note that it feels good to watch a game that I know we are gonna win throughout. But then in the third quarter, despite the fact that everyone is shooting the lights out (70% for both teams) the Bears are catching up and even get to within 2 points and I find myself getting nervous. In the end we squeak by the Bears with a win and play our regularly high pitched play for the last few minutes and I sigh a relief at the end: UT 82, Baylor 77… Sorry Charlie.

Rita the New Nurse comes over to decannulate me and I’m outa there and on my way thru drizzly streets to the Bill Clinton show. Hillary’s Austin headquarters is in the old Kinky Friedman headquarters, which used to be the Ben White Enterprise facility. I drive up to the place and there’s cops with flashing cars sparkling in the puddles all over the parking lot... and every other parking lot within 8 blocks is full to the brim. I cruise around slowly, looking for a piece of turf to put my truck on, swinging past the place a few times. There are swarms of people descending on the joint, like the flocks we see coming to Zilker for a Stones concert. I finally give up and decide that even if I get in, I won't be able to get up front.

I drive on home and watch Bill on TV. Turns out he is an hour late, so it was a good move on my part to forgo the whole thing. And, so it goes.

Notes: In at 75.9 and out at 74.6 Kgs.
*Sekou Sundiata reading “Bring on the Reparations” online at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWhnZPeW644